I am an unstable isotope

Hello.

1. I beat cancer thrice.       2. I cheat death every day.

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"I am an unstable isotope—an anomaly; a rogue; a deviation from the conventional elements. I want to glow with radioactive effervescence for as long as my decaying life can last, and go out with a bang in a nuclear explosion."

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3. Most days I feel suffocated.       4. Anger feels like acid coursing through my veins.

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"The scariest moment in my life was when I was fully awake but I could not breath, I could not talk, and I could not move. My lungs felt like they had turned to stone and the intense panic from asphyxiation with my eyes wide open made me realise how insufferable it would be to be awake yet dying."

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5. I dream of love and life

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"June 6: I find myself missing you already. Because you were there when I was most vulnerable and you let me hold your hand until I fell asleep."

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